Ouch

"Hey how was your uh...your sporting event this weekend?"

Oh it was really good. Pretty tiring, but my team played well.

"When you say 'your team,' are you talking about the old college crew?"

No, I coach at my high school...so it was the high school girls that were playing at camp.

"Ahh. Well that's a compliment to them. They must really love the sport."

Yeah, I think they really do.

"Of course, it's not as hard as ping pong..."

Never Seen That Kind Before!

We were taking the shortcut from the front door of Mr. Pitt's condo to my car, and walking underneath one of the trees, he suddenly stopped walking.

With his cane, he starting poking or pointing at something on the ground, and said with joy, "oooh! Looks like the flowers are blooming! Hmm...I've never seen that kind before."

It was a pine cone.


...I'll give him a little credit, though. The pine cone was kind of green?

Creepy, or Cute?

"You're so damn efficient! I wish you could just reproduce. Yourself. Reproduce yourself!"

Uh...What, like a clone?

"Yeah yeah yeah!! Then I'd still have one of you around when you go off to school in September."

I'll Be Darned

Got a voice mail from Mr. Pitt yesterday (Sunday afternoon):

"Oh hey, Heather...Mr. Pitt here. Hey listen, I thought I would catch you before you went out of town but uh....I guess...well, oh well. Hey, I got something for ya that I need done. When you get a chance give me a call...uh, Okay."

I called back.

Hi, Mr. Pitt.

"Heather! Heather Heather Heather....hey I thought you would have been out of town by now!"

Oooh yeah. Well, I am. I'm in Stockbridge.

"Oh...Oh?"

He thought about it for a while...

"Your phone can reach that far?"

Well. Yes...It's a cell phone. It can pretty much reach anywhere in the country.

Still thinking about it...

"I'll be darned...I wonder if mine can do that."


And then he proceeded to explain what it was that he wanted me to do.

The recent issue of the magazine Inside The Vatican which he received was not from the correct year which he had requested. Long story short, I need to write a letter, print it, address it, have him personally sign it, and mail it to the publishers in Rome. And it can't wait until Wednesday.

He's a First-Class Guy

We went into Rite Aid today so we could stock up on Mr. Pitt's wine for the weekend. He stopped at the counter to talk with the cashier whom he knows, and I went to grab his two bottles of red wine (Yellowtail and Red Rock...in case you're interested). When I came back, Mr. Pitt and the cashier were laughing and chatting, seeming to have a nice time. When we walked out the door and walked across the parking lot, Mr Pitt said,

"Yeeeah...I like to B.S. sometimes."

B.S.?

"Yeah, yeah... I...I'll tell you when you're older."

I know what B.S. means...I just thought you actually liked talking to her!?

"Oh I do, I do...it's sincere."

So...it's NOT B.S.

"Well...it's sincere B.S."

Oh...uh. Ok.

"I'm a first-class B.S.-er!"

What Really Matters

"Heather, I respect your feelings... You're free, white, and 21!"
~ Mr. Pitt

Now I See Why He Has So Much Money

"Two can live as cheap as one!.....As long as the wife only eats rice."
~ Mr. Pitt

More Similar Than You May Think?

Walking back inside Mr. Pitt's apartment building this afternoon,


Wow, check out the size of that spider on the door.

"My God...I thought that was a weed."

(Just to make sure I heard him correctly...) A weed?

"Well yeah, I don't know the difference."

D34R J35U5...

One of the first dozen times we ate at the same coney island, I was trying to catch up on some gossip via text while we were waiting for our food. At that time, I wasn't sure how he felt about phones-at-the-table conduct, so I held my phone in my lap, beneath the table.

After I finished my phone-ing, I looked up to see Mr. Pitt just smiling with his head cocked to one side, staring at me, and ever-so-slightly nodding his head...

"You know...I just really love to see that people your age still take time to pray before meals."

...and as he continued his happy grin and nodded at me in satisfaction, all I could do was smirk back and agree with him.

It's All in a Day's Work

Example of a standard daily agenda, written and requested by Mr. Pitt:

Agenda - 7-11-10

• Signs of apostasy
• How many requests for release from celibacy since Pope Paul IV?
• Summary of "Vagina Monologues"
• How many minutes in machine to warm cold pizza?
• Statistics of neuropathy. How many people die?
• Find "principal of doubale effect"
• Arrange 2009 Xmass cards
• Obtain map of Disney World
• Type letter to Kathy
• Temperature in Cancun
• Computer lesson
• Purchase Bamboo fertilizer (see attached)

For Future Reference

Note:

If you ever dine with Mr. Pitt and he reaches for the salt, take cover.

The distribution of the pouring of his salt is as follows:

• The first 25% goes into the palm of his hand so he knows that it is, in fact, salt that is coming out of the salt shaker.


• 12% falls onto the food for which the salt is intended.


• 18% may find its way onto your plate and likely into your beverage, as well (this is where strategic plate and cup placements as well as defensive hands will prevent over-salting of YOUR food).


• The remaining 45% is scattered across nearly the entire booth (mostly the table, but partly the seats).

You Learn Something New Everyday!

"What does that sign say??"

...











"...oh, it's a dot. What does that mean?"

It's a pretty popular store...

"I've never heard of it before. Is it like my place...uh...Costco?"

Sure.

Trying to Speak Tech-Savvy

Mr. Pitt totally switched it up today, and he had me go to Boston Market to pick up some lunch.

He ordered the side sampler, which consisted of cornbread and 3 items of his choice (he picked mixed veggies, sweet potatoes, and caesar salad). He also got a brownie.

He dove into the vegetables first and was marveling at how delicious they were when he said,

"You know...I'm going to have to get multiple...copies, if that's the right word (it wasn't), of this and put them in the...the machine there (the refrigerator)."

Teach an Old Dog New Tricks

Mr. Pitt was squeezing a mustard bottle over his burger.

Nothing but air was coming out for about 12-15 seconds.

I put out my hand, and he gave me the bottle.

I shook the bottle downward one time

And handed it back to him.

He opened it, and magically, mustard came out.

His eyes got wide, and he opened his mouth (in awe, I'm guessing).

After he spread his mustard evenly over the burger with his knife he said,

"You know...I'm going to have to remember that trick!! I have a mustard bottle at home that does that..."

Disappointed Viewer

Watching TV and/or reading Catholic World News -

"My God! I look up, and who do I see?.....Obama!"

Well, he is the President.

"Every day!"

Insert Female Joke Here

A few months ago...

We were in the car on the way to rehab, when I mentioned something about (boyfriend) Joe graduating and that he was student teaching...

"I always admired male teachers...THEY really know how to handle the classroom"

Uh... I know a lot of authoritative female teachers.

"Really? I don't know... I think men have...that...that presence. They seem to fair better than the women."


Then I decided to just stop talking for the remainder of the ride. Until Mr. Pitt broke the lengthy silence by saying (he knew that Andy and I moved into the Ferndale house)...

"So, I take it YOU cooked supper last night?"

Why? Because I'm a woman?

"Yeah! I mean, women have that talent..."


And then we had a fantastic discussion about "where people belong" in the world and what jobs men and women should have. It was super fun...